Reclaiming my body

I was having a little moan to my husband about how my body just doesn't feel like it belongs to me anymore: it belongs to our girls.  Hours are spent feeding, cuddling, calming and carrying the baby.  When I'm not holding her the toddler wants a cuddle or is doing a great impression of a shadow and clinging on to me when we're out and about, or following me around when we're at home so I can't even go to the loo on my own.  


I moaned that I feel I'm always looking after them but don't have the time or ability to look after myself.  I really meant that I would like to have a shower alone, with the door shut, and actually enjoy the experience of steam, zesty shower gel and squeaky clean hair.  Instead it is a chore involving jumping in and out and trying to wash myself while observing the toddler pulling down the towels and waking the baby by enthusiastically bouncing her chair.  


My husband's response was that he thought I was looking after myself very well... through my exercise programme.  His response really made me think again about my body.  Instead of seeing it as something that has been taken from me, I am actually  reclaiming it.  Exercising is something that I do for myself.  Almost the only thing that I do for myself at the moment.  Looking back at my motivations for exercising I am reminded that looking and feeling good is important for me mentally as well as physically.  Of course, it also benefits the children as they have a happy and healthy mum, but I am driving this forward and I am motivating myself and I am doing this for me.


I may be looking a bit dishevelled but I am up and about and will be clothes shopping soon!