Six months postpartum

Six months ago I was sitting in this chair holding a tiny, precious, bundle of life with a spare tyre for a waist and eager to shape up.  So much has changed in half a year.  Here's my subjective assessment of my progress in the flab mum to fab mum quest.

I've given up measuring my tummy and the only scales we own are kitchen ones.  I've realised that life is so different post-children and my body has gone through such changes that it does not make sense to be measuring and weighing myself in an attempt to look as I did before I became a mum.  It is better for me to look forward and get in shape for our lives now and in the future, to acknowledge and accept my changing body.  That is my small backlash against the myth that beauty is eternal youth.

Although still sleep-deprived (when will she sleep through the night?) I usually feel generally OK and have enough energy to keep up with the kids.  I get a few aches and pains, usually in my back, but nothing too troublesome.  My neck and shoulders were often sore after a day at work but feel looser now.  My limbs are strong and well toned from walking and lifting.  Under my wobbly tummy I now have some muscle although it is a far cry from a six-pack! 

I used to struggle to get to sleep even when exhausted but now I'm frequently asleep within 20 minutes of getting into bed.  My complexion is remarkably clear and mentally I feel alert despite the tiredness.  In short, exercising is giving me all the benefits I hoped for.  I look and feel better than I have for ages.  I just have to keep it up.  Oh, and I have some lovely new clothes...!

Inspire a Generation

As the Olympics and Paralympics finish and those involved concentrate on the legacy of London 2012 and their slogan "Inspire a Generation", I wonder how I can do the same at home.  

My toddler is going through a phase of mimicking the words and behaviour of those around her.  She feeds, winds, cuddles and rocks her baby doll (sometimes it also gets told off and put on the naughty step!), helps me with the housework, pretends to cook, tries to encourage me to eat.  Recently I have noticed that she has also been copying me doing my exercises.

I've often heard that the children of active parents, particularly active mums, are more likely to exercise.  In 2008 an article in the British Medical Journal - Early life determinants of physical activity in 11 to 12 year olds - looked at the impact of exercise in pregnant women and mums with young children on the same children when they got older.  Unsurprisingly, they concluded that there is some association between a parent's level of activity and their child's.  There are, however, so many factors to consider, not least genetics, that to me it seems like a nature versus nurture debate.

Nature is unlikely to have produced a top performing athlete in our daughter, but I will nurture her enthusiasm for having a go by involving her in my exercise routine.  I'm pleased to see her trying to join in.  I want her to see that being active is normal and exercise is fun.  Why drive when you can walk?  Dance in the kitchen if you like the music on the radio.  Run in the park and see if you can catch the pigeons.  

I don't want her to be turned off sport, as I was, for not being good enough.  If we are truly going to inspire a generation, a whole generation and not just the naturally able, then surely we need to encourage the gifted and motivate the rest.  To me, that is the challenge in the Olympic legacy and the challenge as a parent.  We don't need to be the fastest, we just need to be fit and healthy.

Reclaiming my body (part two) and my mind

Sorry for absence this month.  I don't really have a good excuse, I suppose I have just been trying to catch up with myself.  

We're starting a big clear out and it was with joy that along with the newborn and 0-3 month baby clothes I was also able to pack up not only my maternity clothes but also the trousers I had bought a size too big as I grew into and out of proper maternity wear.  I'm not back to my old shape but I am back in my old clothes.  Hurray!

Talking to other new mums I realise that we all have little things that we do to make ourselves feel better despite the sleep deprivation.  One friend always wears a bit of jewellery, another puts on mascara each day.  I have nice pyjamas, try not to wear exactly the same clothes two days in a row (maybe every other day though!) and paint my toenails (three coats so it last ages and I don't have have to take off the varnish until my nail grows).  These small things help to remind us that we are unique, individual women as well as mums.  For me, this little effort makes such a big difference to my sense of self and well being. 

Olympic spirit

We've definitely got Olympic fever in our family.  We went to see the torch go through our area on Monday and the men's cycling road race yesterday, the TV is on  all day and we're channel-hopping between events, and we have tickets for rowing, canoeing and synchronised swimming.


The thing that really inspires me about all the athletes is their discipline, endurance, long-term vision and planning.  It is an attitude that I should try and adopt a bit more when it comes to exercising.  I exercise because I want to be healthy and I want to set a good example to my girls.  I can't really say that I enjoy it, although I do enjoy the benefits of it (social as well as physical), and so I can be easily persuaded to put-off a workout at home.  My reasons are mainly excuses: I'm too tired; I've only just eaten; I've got other things to do; I can't put on my workout DVD because my husband is watching TV...


Athletes don't become Olympians by skipping the bits of their training that they don't like and I will never be a truly fab fit mum if I continue to eat ice cream while watching Team GB instead of doing a few stretches.  Discipline, endurance, long-term vision and planning are words I could do with writing on a post-it note and putting on my mirror.  

The dress

One of my motivations for exercise was fitting into a bridesmaid dress for a hot summer wedding.  There would be no layers to hide under, I was going to be exposed in a navy blue summer dress with a fitted bodice and loose from waist to the knees.  Such a beautiful dress deserved a beautiful body and with the wedding date set for 13 weeks after the birth it seemed reasonable to set getting into this dress as a first challenge to be more fab than flab.  


I did it!  Unfortunately, with the busyness of being a bridesmaid, wife to a best man, and mother to two flower girls I didn't manage to get a photo, so here is one I pinched from someone else and a family photo from a few days after the wedding.  

Trying to stay motivated

The little one is 8 weeks old, 9 weeks in a couple of days, and I'm having a bit of a motivational blip.


Two weeks ago I had a giggle when I found myself doing tricep dips against the bath one evening while waiting for it to fill.  A couple of days later, while waiting for some pasta to cook, I was doing assisted press-ups against the worktop.  Now when I get a moment to myself I just want to flop, right here on the floor a crumpled bundle of me not doing anything except breathing.  I wanted to flop before, and I did but I also exercised.  Now I'm considering buying those pants that hold everything in.


I know that I feel like this because I'm sleep deprived, I've missed a couple of park sessions and therefore missed encouragement from other mums, and because my uterus has contracted and I'm only making small gains (or rather small losses) in the flabby tummy area.  


In the hope that recognising this blip is the first step towards remotivating myself, here is my plan of action:
1)  I will put on my waterproof jacket (rain is providing an excuse to stay in) and buy some soft fruit and a little choccy bar or cake.  The treat is to remind me to be nice to myself and I will eat it on my own in silence when the kids are asleep and enjoy it as a treat, rather than gorging it when the toddler's back is turned and not appreciating it (so wanting another one).
2)  I will plan the exercise session I am going to run on Monday.  I'm volunteering to run this weekly Ready Steady Mums session - come along - and will blog about this another time.
3)  I will try on my bridesmaid dress, which should arrive this week, and feel happy wearing something beautiful.  In four weeks I'll be wearing it for the bride and groom.
4)  I will do some yoga daily, even if only a few minutes of breathing exercises, as that helps me to slow down and appreciate a moment, and it also helps me to sleep. 

Reclaiming my body

I was having a little moan to my husband about how my body just doesn't feel like it belongs to me anymore: it belongs to our girls.  Hours are spent feeding, cuddling, calming and carrying the baby.  When I'm not holding her the toddler wants a cuddle or is doing a great impression of a shadow and clinging on to me when we're out and about, or following me around when we're at home so I can't even go to the loo on my own.  


I moaned that I feel I'm always looking after them but don't have the time or ability to look after myself.  I really meant that I would like to have a shower alone, with the door shut, and actually enjoy the experience of steam, zesty shower gel and squeaky clean hair.  Instead it is a chore involving jumping in and out and trying to wash myself while observing the toddler pulling down the towels and waking the baby by enthusiastically bouncing her chair.  


My husband's response was that he thought I was looking after myself very well... through my exercise programme.  His response really made me think again about my body.  Instead of seeing it as something that has been taken from me, I am actually  reclaiming it.  Exercising is something that I do for myself.  Almost the only thing that I do for myself at the moment.  Looking back at my motivations for exercising I am reminded that looking and feeling good is important for me mentally as well as physically.  Of course, it also benefits the children as they have a happy and healthy mum, but I am driving this forward and I am motivating myself and I am doing this for me.


I may be looking a bit dishevelled but I am up and about and will be clothes shopping soon!     

A wet workout

I had a lazy weekend and didn't leave the flat for two days.  I also ate the last of the Easter chocolate and a takeaway curry, so on Monday I really wanted to get out and move about.


Monday morning was a bit windy and rainy but me and the little one wrapped up and walked to the park for my first outdoor Ready Steady Mums session.  The session was led by a lovely volunteer and as the weather seemed to have kept others away she adapted her session plan to suit me.  Lucky me!  The focus was on gentle movement - walking and swinging my arms, and pushing the pram while doing kicks and lunges - and strengthening my core through stretching and balancing exercises.  


The baby cried a bit to begin with but as soon as we started exercising with the pram it rocked her to sleep and she stayed like that for the rest of the session and I was able to keep my focus on the workout.  I felt good afterwards and re-motivated.  I felt all the benefits and no twinges or discomfort, and that has given me a confidence boost.  I definitely must do more of the same. 

My motivations

·               At 38 weeks pregnant my waist size is one metre.  I’m quite a small person: that is almost one third of my height!

·               I’m going to be a bridesmaid when the baby is 10 weeks old (if it arrives on time) and want to look and feel good for the bride and groom (and the photos!)

·               The weather will be warmer and I can spend time outside with the toddler and the newborn, making exercise much more pleasant

·               If I exercise I’m less likely to get run-down mentally and physically

·               If I can exercise with others I’ll meet other mums

·               I need some new clothes and I want to buy them in my usual size